from koptalk.com

Hospitals on Merseyside are bracing themselves for a huge increase in births over the next couple of weeks as a result of Liverpool winning the Champions League nine months ago.

One local hospital expects to see a hundred or more new arrivals check in as a result of happy dad's celebrating Steven Gerrard lifting the trophy in Instanbul last May.

Gold Club member Chris reported yesterday that his wife had just given birth to little Kathryn and we expect plenty of more new Reds to arrive on the scene soon and not just on Merseyside.

Congratulations to Chris and his Mrs and anyone else who is celebrating


wonder how many singaporean dads were that happy when singapore won the tiger cup two years ago,

maybe the cause of our declining birth rates is our national team's failure to win more tournaments? i mean we don't have this sort of problems when we were in the malaysia cup and winning them,  ¶ 4:44 am 0 comments

 
the importance of being idle

there is no better pleasure than sitting down after walking around for hours and hours in the hot sun, the immediate feeling of relieve that makes you go "aahhhh" the moment your bum touches the soft, comfy cushion is literally priceless

in the same manner, getting up after lying in bed but it's not time to get up yet (it's never time to get up come to think of it) is a bitch, truly


i particularly hate it if somebody wakes me up ten minutes earlier than the time i set on my clock, i know it's petty, but you see, it's a chain reaction, ten minutes might be all the time i need to finish off that prefect dream or totally sleep off the weariness from the night before,

maybe, those ten minutes are the last ten minutes i'll ever get to sleep through for the rest of my life, in fact, probably, the world would be a quieter (and arguably better) place with me in lala land for those damn 10 minutes,

i really need sleep i think  ¶ 4:00 am 0 comments

  who says nothing malay has reached the olympics yet?

was channel surfing and chanced upon the sports channel coverage of the winter olympics, nothing special except for a skier from madagascar who made his sunny country proud on ice,


anyway, i was preparing for a second round of surfing when the coverage switched to an ang moh man throwing (sliding rather) a piece of rock shaped like a unhollowed batu lesung, across an ice alley, to add to the bizarreness, two men, from opposing teams, then proceeded to vigourously sweep the area in front of the lesung with brooms like penyapu traditional and "kleenex floor wipes",
this changes the course of the sliding 19kg worth of solid granite, i learnt

welcome to the sport of curling,
i mean after chess made it as an official olympic event, nothing else could be worst i guess  ¶ 10:22 pm 0 comments

  watch mrs henderson - it's witty, has good jokes, great soundtrack, judi dench packs a punch with her lines and there're naked women all around, parading as statues and art, go watch  ¶ 3:04 am 0 comments

  car woes

i saw a car on fire on the expressway just now, i mean it was really burning up in flames, with black fumes spewing out from what used to be an ah beng souped up lancer, when i saw the electronic sign saying car in flames, i thought it must be a pathetic attempt of whoever it was controlling the signboard to be humourous, (something like what i'm always trying to do probably, but it was true, the car was in flames

it was probably an omen for me for as on a slope a few minutes after that, i tore off my handbrake - i mean the damn stick really came off in my hands, i mean i know i'm all powerful and all (barf barf), but it was kind of amazing, i think the lady in the vehicle next to mine was quite shocked then amused, but too polite to laugh  ¶ 1:14 am 0 comments

    ¶ 1:34 pm 0 comments

 

a man at twenty five is stuck in a hapless purgatory - he sees the long winding road ahead, it is open and inviting but at the same time scary,

he knows the road wouldn't be any less rocky than the many smaller roads he'd travelled before - that it would be more difficult to come back onto the road now if he strays too far away from it,

gone is his rashed blessing of impulsiveness, replaced by a heart perverted by contemplations and practical thought,

but what he fears most is the realisation the road has no u-turns, and that having come thus far, and with the end no where in sight, how his journey would end  ¶ 8:48 pm 0 comments

  the legend is true - loch ness monster exists! and it has a baby

  ¶ 5:22 pm 0 comments

 
girls love shoes and guys love guys
every girl worth her prada and gucci knows that a good pair of shoes, that one perfect pair in silver lined with beaded diamonds from sierra leone that matches her newly bought dress to be worn to a best friend's wedding is worth a lot more than than, well, the next pair of shoes (or her salary)

she knows that the perfect pair of shoes are the ones that go with only maybe 2 dresses - this gives her an excuse to go shopping and buy matching shoes for her tons of other tops and dresses in the bulging wardrobe,



guys are no better,

in fact, instead of shoes, we are obsessed with other men - gasp - (not that there is anything wrong with that - i don't want to be head-hunted by feminist and gay activists for this piece)


anyway, guys don't care a hoot for anything else as long as we can become beckham, jordan, rossi, brad pitt, and sometimes all of them at the same time, hell i know of one who aims to become singapore's answer to the MILF hunter, but that's another story

you almost never hear a guy say, "wow, i which i had a pair of earrings like beckham" but you'll always hear at sunday basketball court soccer matches grown men saying "ah, look who's ronaldinho, i'm he," os something to that effect as he executes a lame imitation of fake-overs,


so we wear our hair in a mullet kind of wave because beckham wears it like that and we buy yamaha bikes because rossi is paid to ride one, we buy air jordans so that we can leap tall buildings in a single bound, we try to get a super babe girlfriend who wants to adopt cambodian children because brad did that, the list goes on,

it's hard to admit but we like other guys, we want to be in the cool guy's company, we want to be them even, that's the reason why we gush over our sports heroes and hollywood darlings, and that's why, when we say we want to buy that oh so expensive pair of football boots or that cool red mini cooper it's not for us, but simply to satisfy our genetic cravings to have david beckham's right leg and mark wahlberg's tool, (this last reference would only be clear to those who have watched boogie nights)  ¶ 2:10 am 0 comments

 
The offside rule explained for girls from www.koptalk.com

You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.
The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them with desire.
Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.
The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.
Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma.

She prepares to throw her purse to you.
If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes.
At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, *whilst it is in flight* you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes.
Always remembering that until the purse has *actually been thrown* it would be plain wrong to be forward of the other shopper.  ¶ 6:49 am 0 comments